


Harmless

by seathehorizon



Category: K-pop, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Gods & Goddesses, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-01
Updated: 2020-08-01
Packaged: 2021-03-04 07:01:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24789667
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seathehorizon/pseuds/seathehorizon
Summary: “Please let it go,” Namjoon sighed when Hoseok complained about Yoongi for the umpteenth time. “You had a land shark attack him, of course he retaliated.”“They’re threatening to kick me out, Joon,” Hoseok whined. “This is a big deal!”
Relationships: Jung Hoseok | J-Hope/Min Yoongi | Suga
Comments: 6
Kudos: 80
Collections: Cupid's Fic Fest 2020





	Harmless

**Author's Note:**

  * In response to a prompt by Anonymous in the [cupidsficfest2019](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/cupidsficfest2019) collection. 



> **Prompt:**
> 
> hoseok is the god of mischief. while he sometimes really goes all out in his pranks (especially when he’s bored), most of the time he’s going around turning birds gay and stuff. he meets yoongi, a deiti of the forest who’s very much pissed over all his bee and butterfly friends having sudden sexuality crisis. 
> 
> just a fun kind of enemies to lovers prompt, you can do whatever you want with it but if you’re so inclined, smut would be nice!
> 
> Ngl, I struggled with this one a bit; I feel like Hobi was trying to play tricks on me as well.

Hoseok giggled to himself as he watched Namjoon try to get into his home, which was completely covered in jelly. The God of Wisdom was scratching his head, a dumbfounded look on his face as he tried to figure out how to get to his door. A silly, pointless prank, yes, but it made Hoseok laugh and he actually liked Namjoon, so he didn't want to harm him. Besides, Namjoon was clever and he'd figure out a way in soon enough (though he couldn't get to his books right now for help - his home was essentially an antique library - but in Hoseok's opinion, he should do his name justice and know everything off by heart).

Shoving his hands in his pockets, he wandered off in the other direction, figuring he'd hear the end of the story later. Right now he had other places to be and more interesting things to do.

Hoseok was the God of Mischief. He lived in what was essentially heaven, if that was what you wished to call it; some humans seemed to do so. The only contact Hoseok had with humans was whenever he visited the human realm, as there were no interactions here (odd, really). He rarely pulled big pranks in the human world, though, not wanting to accidentally harm the more vulnerable, but he did enjoy moving keys around or causing random appearances of the Loch Ness Monster or the Yeti, to keep people on their toes.

His favourite everyday prank - which he would check up on now - was making animals fall in love with each other, specifically a gay kind of love, because there was enough heteronormativity in the world and he wanted to show something different, show it was still natural. He was headed towards the nearby forest where he had turned some birds and bees earlier, ready to return them to their regular state - well, the ones that had been straight to begin with, of course, as the rest had remained as normal.

He hummed as he entered the forest, grinning to himself at how happily two birds were dancing around each other. A mating dance, perhaps? He wasn't sure, he didn't know enough about the species to be able to tell. Either way, it was quite adorable and he stopped for a moment to watch, hoping to remember their appearance so he could research it later (nature was fascinating).

When he went deeper into the forest, he could hear someone who sounded upset, or annoyed, or possibly both, not quite fitting in with the peacefulness of the surroundings. Curious, he drew closer, until he could see a figure through the trees. A smile grew upon his face at the sight of Yoongi, a forest deity Hoseok had admittedly never spoken to, though he had seen him before from afar and he had always found him incredibly pretty. Plus, Namjoon had mentioned him a few times and spoke of him very fondly, so at the very least he should be interesting to speak to.

"Problems?" Hoseok asked, his voice ringing through the small clearing Yoongi was in and making the other deity jump. (Hoseok would laugh, but he was easily startled himself and it felt like bad luck somehow if he did.)

Yoongi furrowed his eyebrows at Hoseok and gestured around him, a small pout on his lips. "Some asshole turned all the bees gay! The queen bee is ready to lay eggs, but she can't if they're not fertilised, and not enough of the drones are willing to share their sperm. They're confused and-" He suddenly stopped and narrowed his eyes, looking Hoseok up and down slowly. "It's you, isn't it?"

Hoseok shrugged, twisting his mouth and widening his eyes to portray confusion and innocence. It didn't seem to be working on Yoongi, though, who pointed his finger at Hoseok accusingly.

"It is. You're that Jung Hoseok, Namjoonie told me about you. The God of Mischief, they call you."

"Well…" Hoseok grinned, scratching the back of his head. He might as well be honest now. "I _am_ the God of Mischief. And you're Min Yoongi, I've heard of you. It's unclear to me what you do, though."

Yoongi blinked at him, looking highly unimpressed. "I'm a forest deity. I look after the forest." He gestured at a passing bee. "I'm trying to make sure they don't go extinct thanks to their current sexuality crisis." A butterfly fluttered in front of Yoongi's face before settling on his head, the purple of its wings contrasting with the mint colour of Yoongi's hair. His pretty features formed into a frown as he pointed up at it. "And don't even get me started on _them_."

Hoseok couldn't help but be endeared. Yoongi was all kinds of cute, grumpy facial expression or not, and he resembled a nymph or a fairy with the butterfly resting in his hair. "Ah, no need to worry, I can turn them back in a heartbeat!" He snapped his fingers and suddenly several bees flew by, appearing hurried, likely on their way to their queen. "See? I was just having a laugh."

"You were being a dick," Yoongi replied, deadpan. Relief was visible in his eyes as he looked after the bees, though not without adding: "Maybe you should stop playing around and find something useful to do with your time, like the rest of us."

Hoseok gaped at him. He wanted to tell him the prank was only ever meant to be temporary, that it was never meant to be malicious, but the voices of the people telling him how useless and annoying he was stopped him from bothering. What was the point if Yoongi had already made up his mind on him? After all, he had said he had heard about Hoseok, and it didn’t sound as though the stories had been very flattering.

“Strong words from a forest deity,” he said instead. Deity or not, in their hierarchy Hoseok (and Namjoon, for that matter) was placed higher than Yoongi was. In reality it didn’t make a big difference and, to be honest, Hoseok couldn’t care less about any of that crap, but he knew the reminder would sting.

Indeed, Yoongi clenched his jaw and narrowed his eyes. “At least people are willing to listen to me, yet they all avoid you,” he said coldly. Then he turned and left in the same direction as the bees, leaving a stunned and offended Hoseok in his wake.

*******

“Please let it go,” Namjoon sighed when Hoseok complained about Yoongi for the umpteenth time. “You had a land shark attack him, of course he retaliated.”

“They’re threatening to kick me out, Joon,” Hoseok whined. “This is a big deal!” Of course he was sorry for the attack; he had just been trying to quell his boredom by seeing if he could create a land shark, but he hadn’t expected it to actually _work_ , and he certainly hadn’t intended for Yoongi to get hurt. Luckily, it hadn’t been serious and the shark was now happily living among crocodiles while Yoongi was still safe. He had apologised, genuinely regretful but Yoongi had refused to accept, apparently preferring to believe that Hoseok had wanted him injured.

In any case, Yoongi had reported him to the higher-ups and now Hoseok was running the risk of needing to leave this realm. Sure, it was his own fault for not thinking, but if Yoongi had just believed him, they could have moved past this. There had been some small pranks before then, like the go-away-bird that had followed Yoongi around for a week, all harmless, so how could Yoongi think he was dangerous?

(He had ended up with no more than a deep scratch on his arm thanks to the help of the forest animals: they cared for Yoongi an awful lot and had helped him out. Hoseok, meanwhile, had nearly had a heart attack - you know, if gods could get those - from pure fright when Namjoon had told him the news.)

“You should talk to him,” Namjoon suggested. “Clear the air.”

Hoseok rolled his eyes. “For someone who’s so wise, you know so little. I’ve tried, he won’t listen to me. Besides, if I do try to speak to him now, it will look insincere.” Not addressing the issue until it affects him personally - yes, that would give off a great impression.

“That may be true, but Yoongi hyung’s not unreasonable,” Namjoon insisted. “He was scared, of course he didn’t want to listen to you immediately, and he reported you for the same reason: fear. He doesn’t know you well enough to gauge your intentions, but he probably expected a slap on the wrist, not the possibility of you being banished. Although, if you had planned a targeted attack, you would deserve as much.”

Hoseok pouted, begrudgingly agreeing. He supposed he could see Namjoon’s point. That didn’t mean he had to like it, though.

Namjoon breathed out through his nose, exasperated. “Will you at least consider it?”

“Fine,” Hoseok relented. “I’ll think about it.”

That seemed to appease Namjoon, who then went on to tell him the exact type of bird he had seen that first day in the forest, having done the research for him.

And Hoseok did think about it. But someone seemed to have beaten him to the punch, for after several interviews about the entire situation, Yoongi withdrew his complaint without specifying the reason. And so Hoseok was allowed to stay. He might have still reached out to Yoongi after, if it hadn’t been for the message he had left him: “Now we’re even.”

The next day a flock of crows had swooped down at Hoseok when he left his home, making him scream. They hadn’t even pecked him and simply flown away, though one had dropped a note with another message: “Now we’re not.” With a smiley face at the end. A _smiley face_. Hoseok still hadn’t figured out if that was cute or terrifying, but he _had_ taken it as an invitation to continue whatever little feud they had.

Which left him here.

Hoseok was watching Yoongi from up a tree, his hands covering his mouth so he wouldn't hear him laugh. (He was terrified of heights, but he hadn't wanted to miss this, so he'd had to make sacrifices. And he had asked for help from Jimin, his favourite fairy, who had given him a _look_ yet had provided him with a charm that would keep him safe from falling.)

There was a pretty little bird on Yoongi's shoulder, with blue eyes and a blue sheen covering its feathers, its long tail draping down Yoongi's back (what was it with the deity and birds anyway?). It was almost as though it were speaking to him, and Yoongi occasionally made a noise in return or spoke to it softly. The only reason Hoseok could even tell he was talking, was because his lips were moving and the bird would ruffle its feathers and become a little louder. It was rather adorable, though Hoseok refused to admit it.

Ignoring the absurd urge to squish Yoongi’s cheeks, he focused his attention back on his goal: the flowers Yoongi was now approaching. He grinned to himself as Yoongi slowed down, confusion radiating off him as he shuffled around and viewed the flowers from different angles.

You see, Yoongi had planted the seeds recently and hey, Hoseok had been kind: he had made them grow faster! Except he had also slightly changed their appearance - they now all resembled genitals. Different shapes, different sizes, but all unmistakably explicit.

"Great way of proving your powers aren't useless," Yoongi called out, turning in a circle, his eyes flitting from one possible hiding spot to the other. "Get over here and show yourself, I know you're watching."

Hoseok scoffed, disappointed at the lack of response. It wasn't as fun this way, Yoongi was too calm. Then again, it wasn't his best work and it was in fact quite juvenile, but after the land shark he wasn’t taking any chances. And if he also didn't want to _actually_ upset Yoongi, well, no one needed to know.

He shrieked when the bird that had been with Yoongi was suddenly flapping around in front of him. A triumphant "ha" came from Yoongi's mouth and Hoseok pouted as he glared at the little bird (evil creatures, every single one of them), which was now flying back down to Yoongi and twittering in his ear. Well. No point hiding any longer.

Clutching Jimin's charm between his fingers, he carefully made his way down, squealing a little every time he nearly slipped or slid down faster than expected. Why weren't flying or teleportation part of his skills?

When he finally felt the ground beneath his feet, he sighed in relief and slumped against the tree to gather himself before smoothing out his clothes and turning around to face Yoongi. Rather than succeeding in intimidating him, Yoongi's eyes were twinkling in amusement, the corners of his lips turned up. The bird, at least, had flown off somewhere.

"Having some trouble there?" Yoongi asked in that ridiculously deep voice of his (someone with features that soft should not have a voice like that; granted, it wasn't quite as bad as Taehyung, whose voice just did Things to people, but even so, it was frustratingly sexy and Hoseok had definitely not been thinking of it repeatedly over the past few weeks, or months).

Hoseok sniffed and nodded over at the flowers. "Are you?"

Yoongi glanced at them and shrugged. "No. Phallic and vulvic plants and flowers aren't uncommon. These are a bit more obvious, I'll admit, but nature is filled with these forms. It's strange, sure, since I planted irises, but I can make it work." He sighed and crossed his arms. "Anyway… I wanted to apologise."

Hoseok raised his eyebrows, confused.

"Namjoonie told me I’ve been stubborn," Yoongi explained. "The first time we met, I was annoyed and stressed and I took it out on you, and for that I'm sorry." He sighed and rubbed a hand over his stomach. "There’s a very real possibility of extinction for certain animals, including bees. It’s my job to protect them. Moreover, I _want_ to protect them, so when I thought all my work had been pointless, I panicked. Then you pulled all your other pranks and nearly got me killed, so I didn’t exactly hold the highest opinion of you.”

Yoongi eyed him meaningfully and Hoseok coughed awkwardly. Perhaps he had no moral high ground here.

“I never wanted you dead,” he tried to explain, the words feeling odd in his mouth. In his defence, it wasn’t something he had ever had to say before. “I didn’t even think anything would happen since I wasn’t being serious about it, and I usually need to actually focus to create something new.” The Yeti, for example, had been hard work. The shark, on the other hand, had appeared with shocking ease.

“I know. Namjoon explained it to me, which is when I understood that your apology had been genuine. Though… can you blame me for being suspicious?"

No, Hoseok supposed he couldn't. He was also slightly miffed that Yoongi had been the bigger person here and apologised before Hoseok could, even though, really, Hoseok had (unintentionally!) done worse. 

"Don't worry too much, though, the land shark had no teeth and only got me with one of its claws."

Wait. What? "I thought it tried to bite your arm off," Hoseok said, baffled.

"No, just a claw mark… kind of like a cat's," Yoongi admitted. "You managed to form the shark quickly, but it wasn't finished.”

“Wait.” Hoseok frowned and shook his head. “You reported me even though there was barely any danger? I could have been banished when nothing really happened?”

“I didn’t know if you had planned more,” Yoongi protested, which was fair. “Anyway, I told you, I never thought they’d try to banish you.”

Well, this certainly lessened Hoseok’s guilt. Not by much, mind you, but he could sleep a little easier now (not that he needed much sleep). “Then…”

“Look...” Yoongi crouched down, his fingers trailing over a distinctly penis-shaped flower, leaving Hoseok feeling all sorts of conflicted. “I’ve grown to enjoy our back and forth. Or…” He pouted thoughtfully. “I suppose I got used to it. And Namjoon, he explained a bit more about why it all began, which was when I realised I wouldn’t mind if it continued.” He shrugged, grinning sheepishly.

Hoseok rubbed his arm, unsure how to react. Although he didn’t appreciate Namjoon speaking about him behind his back, in this case it had helped. Apart from the fact that Yoongi likely wouldn’t have spoken to him otherwise, it had saved him from Yoongi pushing forward with his complaint - he didn’t know much about Yoongi firsthand, but Hoseok had a feeling he could be petty when he wanted to be.

He said as much and Yoongi shrugged once more, though he didn’t deny it.

“I don’t know whether thanks are truly in order,” Hoseok mused. “But thank you.” He didn’t like to hold grudges and now that Yoongi had apologised, why would he bother with being angry? He had wanted to talk to Yoongi for a while, so he might as well take this as his opportunity.

“I know Namjoon already talked to you,” he said, deciding to explain himself at least a little, “but your words that first time, they stung. I get told often enough that I’m useless, people dislike me when they don’t even know me.” Namjoon and Jimin were some of his only friends, as most preferred to pretend he simply didn’t exist. “I didn’t choose mischief, but it is my life, and it influences how I act and react. So… I am sorry for everything I put you through, I never meant to hurt or upset you.”

Yoongi offered him a small smile and nod. “I know. I also know what it’s like not to be taken seriously and to have people trample all over you. To give you an idea, I’ve often been called ‘too dainty’ to be a deity, because apparently someone like me can’t possibly be in charge of anything.” He rolled his eyes. “Whatever that means. Some prefer to stick to their misconceptions."

Hoseok hummed in agreement, not pointing out that Yoongi himself had nearly done exactly that. He was trying to start over and bringing up the past wouldn’t be very conducive to that. “You know, I can make people laugh, or think, show them different sides to the world, but no one seems to understand.” Part of the reason he kept up the mystery of legendary creatures was in hopes that it would make people aware of the importance of preserving nature, but instead it constantly led to conspiracy theories and mockery.

“I won’t lie, I fail to see how turning all birds gay makes anyone think,” Yoongi admitted in a low voice, though not unkindly. “Laugh, maybe, but for me it was frustrating more than anything else.”

Hoseok offered him a wry smile. “It was because of the irony. You know how people use the birds and the bees when teaching children about reproduction? Well…” He shrugged. “Of course, even being gay, they could reproduce, because there are females who can produce sperm and males who can lay eggs, though humans often insist differently because some of them seem to think everyone is cis. No matter what, it would go against the general idea of what birds and bees stand for.”

“So you… wanted to make people laugh while also teaching them about sexualities and gender identities?” Yoongi frowned pensively. “I guess I understand where you were coming from, but you do understand that apart from me, no one would ever realise what you’d done? Except forest nymphs, I suppose, but there aren’t that many in these parts. Others generally don’t pay much attention.”

Oh. Yes. Perhaps there was indeed a flaw to his plan; he shouldn’t rely on everyone’s observation skills this much. “Did it make _you_ think?” he asked, attempting to brush past that.

Yoongi merely stared at him, then tilted his head. “Not exactly. Besides, you do realise I’m not straight, right? And I’ve been with a nymph before who was nonbinary.”

No, Hoseok had _not_ realised that. Mind you, he had been too preoccupied hating Yoongi to wonder about his interests (that was a lie). And it still didn’t matter to him whatsoever (another lie). He also couldn’t care less who the nymph was (he wondered if Jimin knew).

“Oh. Well, maybe it wasn’t aimed at you, then.” Then again, he thought everyone could always afford to continue to learn, but his method had perhaps not been very effective. It couldn’t hurt to upgrade his pranks and re-evaluate what he wanted to accomplish with them.

“I consider myself a lover of all, myself,” Hoseok then blurted out. He resisted the urge to smack himself, but he wanted to share that he understood too. “Not everyone appreciates that,” it certainly hadn’t made him any more popular among other Gods and Goddesses, “but I tell myself that’s their problem. Which it is, to be fair, even if they don’t see it that way.” It was why he was often extra friendly and cheerful around them, because it only seemed to infuriate them further and that did honestly amuse him.

“They never do,” Yoongi agreed.

“It’s part of why I do what I do. I guess… I want them to know there’s nothing wrong with it, and I want others like me to know and feel less alone.”

There was a lull in the conversation and Hoseok used that moment to consider his current predicament. He was with Yoongi, in the forest, right by a field of flowers shaped like penises and vulvas, some more detailed than others, and they were having a conversation. A genuine, normal conversation, without either of them insulting the other or trying to piss him off in some other manner. Before today, that had seemed impossible.

Perhaps… Perhaps Yoongi wasn’t _all_ bad. And perhaps Namjoon had been right, and they should’ve just talked this out from the start rather than resort to childish revenge (if it could even be called that; Seokjin, the God of Chaos, had called it a desire for attention).

“Did you know there's a species of bees that can reproduce asexually?” Yoongi suddenly said, sounding almost wistful. “It would make my life much easier if they could all do that.”

Well. Hoseok had not known that, no, but he had to admit it was an interesting piece of trivia. And quite an amazing feat of evolution. “Can you imagine if all animals had that ability?” he mused. “The ones that truly need it, mostly, or it might get messy.” He squatted down beside Yoongi, who hummed his agreement, and decided he preferred this over being angry and pulling mostly silly pranks, like the time he made Yoongi's hair change colour wherever he sneezed. It was supposed to make him look ridiculous, but that one had backfired.

Perhaps it was time to bury the hatchet for good. There didn’t seem to be any real bad blood between them and although they surely had plenty of work ahead of them - this wouldn’t be a friendship that formed overnight - it was worth a shot.

"Truce?" he offered.

Yoongi eyed him for a moment, then smiled, fumbling with his ear. "Sure. Truce."

Hoseok grinned and threw his arm over Yoongi's shoulder, dragging him into an awkward hug. "Well, I do believe this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship."

*******

“Here, try this.” Yoongi held out a piece of honeycomb to Hoseok’s lips. Several months had passed since they had ended their disagreement and over time they had started to meet up more frequently. Initially it had been awkward, the two of them trying to find a way to truly connect, but it had gotten easier. Perhaps too easy.

“Do you have to do that in front of us?” Seokjin complained. “This was meant to be a birthday celebration for Jeongguk here, you’re making him feel left out.”

Jeongguk, a fairy of the stars, looked up with wide eyes, his cheeks stuffed full of food. He swallowed when everyone’s attention was on him and shook his head once. “No, I don’t mind. They’re fine.” He flashed the both of them a smile and shoved another bite-sized burger into his mouth.

Hoseok smiled back at him before hesitantly biting down on the honeycomb, humming in surprise when the perfect sweetness filled his mouth. He never knew how to take it when Yoongi got physically close, but he wasn’t going to complain. It was nice to see him crawl out of his shell more (although when he had mentioned this to Namjoon, his friend had been quick to point out that phrase was painfully wrong, since turtles’ shells were part of their body), as he was quieter, more subtle in his affection - with all of them.

“I never thought I’d like honey this much,” Hoseok said, taking the rest of the honeycomb so he could finish it off, making appreciative noises the entire time. “You really love bees, huh?”

“Yoongi hyung is a honey boy,” Taehyung said before Yoongi could reply, grinning in a way that somehow both cheeky and kind when Yoongi flushed and kicked him under the table. Jimin threw himself backwards like that was the funniest thing he’d ever heard and Seokjin clapped his hands while laughing, but all Hoseok could do was stare at them all confused.

“Erm…”

“He called himself a honey boy once and they never shut up about it,” Namjoon explained, a fond smile on his lips.

“Oh!” Hoseok nodded in understanding. “Because he likes bees.”

Jeongguk snorted and nearly choked on his next bite.

“Can you all shut up?” Yoongi sulked, glaring at them all like an angry kitten. Hoseok resisted the urge to coo.

“It’s okay, you’re a very cute honey boy,” he assured Yoongi, pinching his cheek, admiring its roundness and the pretty red hue it was taking on. He ignored the snickering from their friends and instead focused on the long lashes framing Yoongi’s eyes and on his pouty lips.

In Hoseok’s opinion, not many were as pretty as Yoongi and whenever he hung out with him, he was mesmerised by the sweet features of his face, the pinkness of his knuckles, his elbows, and his soft mannerisms. Even the way he blinked was cute, though Hoseok preferred not to think about all that too much.

Unfortunately, Namjoon had been right about Yoongi: he was kind and funny and warm, and he had turned out to be a good listener and protective friend. He was easy to love, and sometimes he made Hoseok feel the same.

When they left the celebration (Jeongguk had asked for a quiet party, with friends, food and alcohol), Hoseok decided to accompany Yoongi home. Hoseok had made the wise decision to drink little, seeing how his tolerance for alcohol was remarkably low (Gods could handle more than humans, but in Hoseok’s case, this ‘more’ wasn’t that much). Yoongi, on the other hand, had had quite a bit and although he wasn’t exactly drunk, he _was_ tipsy.

“That was fun,” Hoseok said, breathing in the fresh air.

“Hm.” Yoongi shuffled along slowly, his eyes on the ground, fluttering from sleepiness. “I’m glad we’re all friends now. Feels like we’re all where we belong.”

Hoseok felt the same way. Although an unlikely group of friends, it was as though they were always meant to be together. For Hoseok especially it was exciting to have six people around him who accepted him and didn’t make him feel like he was too much, or not enough.

He glanced over at Yoongi and smiled to himself. He, especially, had been there to encourage Hoseok and stand up for him, despite their first impressions of each other.

“You’re my favourite,” he stated. He nearly clutched his chest when Yoongi blinked up at him and then smiled, wide and gummy. God, that was cute. ...Maybe he was a little tipsy after all.

Yoongi grasped Hoseok’s arm and rubbed his head against his shoulder, forcing them to slow down. “And you’re mine,” he mumbled.

Hoseok’s heart skipped a beat. Damn it.

*******

“We need to talk.”

It had only been a few days, but Hoseok didn’t think he could bear to keep quiet any longer. Of course he had known what Yoongi had meant, which on its own was enough to make him want to scream, but he had realised he wouldn’t mind being Yoongi’s; he had a feeling Yoongi would keep him safe.

When Yoongi’s eyes shot over to him, his panic obvious, Hoseok cursed himself for his phrasing and took Yoongi’s hands in his.

“No, no, it’s nothing bad! Humans made that sound bad, but it’s not always bad, I promise!” He squeezed Yoongi’s hand and smiled at him to make the suspicion on his face disappear. “No, it’s good. Or _I_ think it’s good. But we do need to talk about it first. Not now, if you don’t want to, but the sooner the better, I think.”

“If you’re trying to ask me out, you’re doing a terrible job,” Yoongi said dryly.

Hoseok’s mouth went dry and fell open. “I-”

“You?”

This was not at all how he had expected this to go and he could only look at Yoongi helplessly as he attempted to figure out where to go from here.

Yoongi pursed his lips, hiding a smile. “If it helps, I’ll say yes.”

“You’re a dick.”

“But you like this dick,” Yoongi teased.

Hoseok sighed, exasperated and in love.“Fine. Will you be my boyfriend and raise land sharks with me in the forest while we complain about a heteronormative society?”

Yoongi grinned, happy and shy. “I’d love to.”

*******

Yoongi had appeared less happy when his home had been filled with dick flowers the next day.

*******

But his answer never changed (though they never did raise any sharks).

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on [Twitter](http://www.twitter.com/sea_thehorizon). 💜


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